Surprise, Surprise

I am SO happy it's September 12th. Want to know why? Because yesterday, on the 11th, me and Mr. C's side of the family threw a surprise 40th birthday party for him and I HAVE BEEN WANTING TO BLAB ABOUT IT FOREVER!

But I couldn't.

Because it was a surprise. And because sometimes Mr. C checks in and actually reads my blog and I couldn't blow it here on Meanie Mom.

So, in this whole process I've learned two things. Actually it was more like one and a half things. I already knew that I hate planning parties. I wish I could be the kind of party planner who's laid back and takes things in stride, but I'm not. Party planning turns me into a freaky ball of stress. And when I say "freaky ball of stress", I mean take what you think a freaky ball of stress would like on a person, square it, then multiply that by 10, and you're halfway to the hot mess that is me planning a party.

So, the half point beyond the fact that I hate party planning is that I really hate planning a surprise party. More specifically, I hated planning Mr. C's surprise party. This is because as I disintegrate into my quivering mess of insecurities and neurosis, there is only one person in the whole world who I trust to witness me in this pathetic state- and that would be my husband. And while I'm sure he'd be glad to give that honor up to someone else, I REALLY NEEDED him to vent to.

(See how I take something that's supposed to be nice for someone else and turn it into being all about me? It's a talent o' mine.)

Besides, there were just some things that I felt he needed to know. Like when my brother in law sent over a slideshow that he made for the party. I opened it up and watched a bunch of pictures of Mr. C flash on the screen and OH MY GOODNESS all of a sudden it was like I was looking at J! And I wanted to run to Mr. C the minute he walked in the door that day and say "OUR SON IS YOUR MINI ME!  IT'S EERIE!  IT'S UNBELIEVABLE!  IT'S AWESOME!  COME LOOK!"

No, really. Look:

Isn't that nuts? Wouldn't you want to blab all about it to your husband, if you were me?

It's amazing that I held my tongue. Worthy of a medal, really.

The other thing I learned through this whole venture is that if one is going to throw a surprise party, follow the KISS method- which, for those of you who haven't heard this before, stands for: Keep It Simple, Stupid.

Stupid is right. Because after I broke into his email and Facebook accounts to steal his contact's info, I had to:

1. Lie to him about not doing much for his birthday.
2. Coordinate baby sitters for my kids and my nieces and nephews.
3. Play it cool when he told me that he RSVP'd yes to a work party that coincided with the surprise party.
4. Let him think we were going to the work party and tried not to panic upon learning that it was a costume party as well and that he was planning on wearing a costume.
5. Track down the email for the host of the work party, write her, and let her know that we wouldn't really be coming to her party, but to not say anything to Mr. C about it, and then feel slightly awkward about not inviting her to Mr. C's party.
6. Call the restaurant to find out the cost of using an LCD projector & then almost choke upon learning that it would be $265 minimum.
7. Track down a free LCD projector and amp.
8. Lie to him about my whereabouts on the day of the party while I ran around finishing last minute details.
9. Smuggle a 6' x 8' foot slideshow screen out of the house.
10. Talk him out of wearing a costume.
11. Let him think we were driving 9 to the restaurant for a friend's party.
12. Pretend to have to pee so that he would park the car and come in. (And I do believe that that was an Oscar winning performance.)

And of course, during all this there were a million other things going on as well which caused me to whine on the phone to my mother, "WHY does this have to be a surprise? Can't we just tell him?"

Upon which she reminded me that this is not all about me.

I swear, I keep forgetting that.

Anyway, I'm sure you're all wondering whether or not Mr. C was surprised. And the answer is........

not in the slightest.

Which made me want to strangle him.

Instead I just ordered a big glass of wine and enjoyed the rest of the evening. I also made a mental note that for his 50th, I'm going to send him on an Outward Bound Vacation or something.

That way I can just lay around the house with my Kettle Chips and wine.

You all have a good one!