Kindergarten Jesus

Well.

I woke up this morning with plans to spend my kid-free time writing a post about Kindergartners, what a sweet perspective they have on the world and how we should cherish it.  But then I got a call from the office at my son's school asking me to come and get him because he threw up.  So now, instead of thinking about Kindergartners as funny, innocent, little rays of sunshine, I can only picture an army of visious pint-sized tormentors who could potentially mark my son as "the boy who threw up on the second day of school" and tease and taunt him and make him hate school forever and ever.

No, I'm not moody today.  Why do you ask?

Anyway, puking aside, I'm still going to go forward with this post and try not to let my mommy neuroticism get the better of me. I'm also going to try to forget about the fact that I can still, to this day, remember the name of "the pukers" from my elementary school days and hope that video games have softened this generation's young minds enough so that they don't have the same razor sharp clarity of memory that I do, especially when it comes to other kids' humiliations.

But let's not talk about that and move on, shall we?

I started thinking about this post after talking to my friend about her daughter, who is entering Kindergarten this year.  This little girl is bright, sweet, and very creative but my friend was telling me that she was a little worried about taking her in for her pre-K assessment.  Her daughter kept insisting that her last name was Tots- which is actually her nickname.  As a former K teacher, I think that's adorable (and I'm sure her current K teacher would think so too), but because the Pre-K assessment is the first time anyone other than you officially judges your child's ability, my friend was worried.  She and her husband spent days coaching, teaching, and then asking their daughter "What's your full name?" and every time she would gleefully declare "Taytum Tots!"

After some more coaching, she still had a mental block when it came to remembering her last name, but progress was made in that she at least understood that her last name wasn't Tots afterall.  Though her parents continued to work with her, her brain wasn't quite ready for the concept of having two names.  One day, perhaps feeling a little frustrated, her dad decided to take a break.  Her gave her some time, and after a while went back to her and called through the bedroom door- "Hey Taytum!  What's your last name?"  There was a brief silence, in which I imagine Taytum freezing in her play to stop and search for the right answer.  I know she wanted to make her parents proud and I know she wanted to think of a really good name- the right name.

A brief silence, and then she tentatively answered through the door, "Um, Jesus?"

Are you laughing?  I hope you're laughing.  I'm so glad my friend shared this story with me (and that she gave me permission to share it with you).  It reminded me of the countless Kindergarten moments that I experienced when teaching.  Like when it was raining outside and I had a little boy show up for school wearing swimming goggles.  Or the little girl who came to the first day of school with her security blanket tied around her neck like a cape because she couldn't bear just yet to leave it at home.  Or Jamal, whom I wrote about here, who was able to remember the shape of the number 3 because (in his words) "dat look like tits!"

My partner Kindergarten teacher used to say that she loved teaching Kindergarten because the kids come in without knowing how to line up, and leave so much more mature and independent.  This is a bittersweet truth that I only fully understood after becoming a parent.  They go in as babies, but there's a whole hidden curriculum in Kindergarten that's about focusing, learning social skills, and how to function in a group.  Kindergartners will transform into more mature independent thinkers, but it's a trade off.  Their small-ish world gets bigger and loses some magic and innocent perspective.  In a few weeks, Taytum will forget that she ever thought her last name was Jesus.  You won't catch a first grader wearing goggles to school.  And I like to think that Jamal no longer thinks of breasts when he writes a 3 (although that could still be possible).

This is it guys.  This is when the metamorphosis happens.  Enjoy who you're kids become, and treasure  who they are now.  Write it down, tell other people, celebrate it, and don't worry about them not being "smart enough." They'll get there.  They always get there.  Just love the beautiful little spirits that they are now, because it's fleeting.  

And if you'd tell them to be nice to the pukers, I'd appreciate it.  Thanks.