So. A couple of weeks ago Matt and I took Roo to Target to spend some of her birthday cash. She's been on a Wizard of Oz kick for a few months now (or as she calls it, The Lizard a Boz), so when she saw this Special Edition Dorothy Barbie doll on the shelf, she immediately wanted it. We put it in the cart, paid for it, took it home, pulled it out of the box, let her play with it, and when she was done we propped Dorothy up on it's stand and displayed it on her dresser.
That's when I noticed that something was very, very wrong.
Since when does Dorothy's mid-western Kansas garb include thigh-highs? And when did the hem of her dress rise up 6 inches? WHEN did she walk down the yellow brick road in 6 inch heels befitting a porn star? And OH MY WORD SHE IS OUTFITTED IN A LACE UP CORSET THAT EMPHASIZES HER BREASTS! Really? Really, Mattel?
Now, let me leave this topic for a short minute to say that those of you who know me know that I'm a keep-it-simple-kind of girl. I don't put a lot of stock in analyzing things or over thinking them. I know too many people who do this and end up making themselves sound like assholes. (Case in point: Me in college driving in the car with my father. American Pie comes on the radio, and I launch into a 7 minute speech about how I believe that song to be about the loss of American innocence during the Cold War era and the implications of the hippie movement. My father listens, waits a moment, and then says "I'm pretty sure that it's just a song about Buddy Holly's death." See? Classic case of one being a superfluous douche bag.)
However, sometimes you just gotta go there. This is one of those times. This kind of thing has been on my mind anyway for a month or so- ever since last month when I watched an entire female team of 5 year old soccer players take their team picture with identically curled hair and tiaras. I questioned it on Facebook and one of my friends wrote that it was "Just another messed up message we send to our girls." That one resonated with me, though there were a wide variety of opinions on it. Some people said that it showed that girls could still enjoy being girly while kicking butt, and I feel that may be valid as well. If that's true, though, what's the empowering message with the scantily clad Dorothy? That a girl should look her best and show a lot of skin, both over the rainbow and in the real world?
I'm so confused.
I do know that every time I see Roo pick up the doll, I cringe. I feel like every time she plays with it, Slutty Dorothy gets busy with imprinting her secret little message on my daughter's psyche. It's like she's saying "Oh, hi Roo. See my short little dress? See my pretty little stockings with bows at the top of my thighs? Aren't they pretty? Don't you want to be pretty? Be sure to dress just like this when you grow up and everyone (especially boys) will think you're pretty too!"
Yep. I'm pretty sure that's what it is saying, even though Roo probably isn't conscious of it. I'm not even sure she could really verbalize the difference between the looks of the doll and the more modest movie version of Dorothy... I could ask her, but the truth is, I'm a little afraid to. Best case scenario would be that she didn't see the difference at all, and the worst case scenario would be that I would have just pointed it out to her.
The most disturbing question for me in all this though, is why in the world didn't I see all this when I was in the store? I mean, we were at Target to get my new phone too so it's a slight possibility that I was really preoccupied with my new toy and didn't focus properly on hers. But I don't think so. I'm usually too much of a feminist to let this stuff get past me. Maybe this whore-of-a-Dorothy just didn't stand out as much when she was on a shelf amid other sluttinas Barbies? Is that how I didn't see it? Or has society just conditioned me to believe that girls should look this way so that even when I had her in my hand, I didn't even blink at her implied sexiness?
I don't have any answers, or even a good way to conclude this post, except with more questions: Am I over thinking this? Ten years from now will I be sending her back to her room to change into decent attire with her screaming "For christsakes mom! Even my freakin' Barbies are allowed to dress sluttier than me!" Should I burn the doll? What do you all think?
Now, let me leave this topic for a short minute to say that those of you who know me know that I'm a keep-it-simple-kind of girl. I don't put a lot of stock in analyzing things or over thinking them. I know too many people who do this and end up making themselves sound like assholes. (Case in point: Me in college driving in the car with my father. American Pie comes on the radio, and I launch into a 7 minute speech about how I believe that song to be about the loss of American innocence during the Cold War era and the implications of the hippie movement. My father listens, waits a moment, and then says "I'm pretty sure that it's just a song about Buddy Holly's death." See? Classic case of one being a superfluous douche bag.)
However, sometimes you just gotta go there. This is one of those times. This kind of thing has been on my mind anyway for a month or so- ever since last month when I watched an entire female team of 5 year old soccer players take their team picture with identically curled hair and tiaras. I questioned it on Facebook and one of my friends wrote that it was "Just another messed up message we send to our girls." That one resonated with me, though there were a wide variety of opinions on it. Some people said that it showed that girls could still enjoy being girly while kicking butt, and I feel that may be valid as well. If that's true, though, what's the empowering message with the scantily clad Dorothy? That a girl should look her best and show a lot of skin, both over the rainbow and in the real world?
I'm so confused.
I do know that every time I see Roo pick up the doll, I cringe. I feel like every time she plays with it, Slutty Dorothy gets busy with imprinting her secret little message on my daughter's psyche. It's like she's saying "Oh, hi Roo. See my short little dress? See my pretty little stockings with bows at the top of my thighs? Aren't they pretty? Don't you want to be pretty? Be sure to dress just like this when you grow up and everyone (especially boys) will think you're pretty too!"
Yep. I'm pretty sure that's what it is saying, even though Roo probably isn't conscious of it. I'm not even sure she could really verbalize the difference between the looks of the doll and the more modest movie version of Dorothy... I could ask her, but the truth is, I'm a little afraid to. Best case scenario would be that she didn't see the difference at all, and the worst case scenario would be that I would have just pointed it out to her.
The most disturbing question for me in all this though, is why in the world didn't I see all this when I was in the store? I mean, we were at Target to get my new phone too so it's a slight possibility that I was really preoccupied with my new toy and didn't focus properly on hers. But I don't think so. I'm usually too much of a feminist to let this stuff get past me. Maybe this whore-of-a-Dorothy just didn't stand out as much when she was on a shelf amid other sluttinas Barbies? Is that how I didn't see it? Or has society just conditioned me to believe that girls should look this way so that even when I had her in my hand, I didn't even blink at her implied sexiness?
I don't have any answers, or even a good way to conclude this post, except with more questions: Am I over thinking this? Ten years from now will I be sending her back to her room to change into decent attire with her screaming "For christsakes mom! Even my freakin' Barbies are allowed to dress sluttier than me!" Should I burn the doll? What do you all think?
Now you know why you never got that Barbie doll for Christmas. Your Mom would have none of it. I on the other hand was thinking more on the whole Gepetto/Pinocchio line and.............. oh well never mind that. Good blog Boo.
ReplyDeleteTacy,
ReplyDeleteThis is history repeating itself. When you were in K, you wanted Barbies. I was not going there. I found the whole Barbie thing offensive, and was not going to lead you down that path. By first grade, I realized you were picking your friends by who had Barbies that you could play with. I relucantly allowed you to have a Barbie or two. I am thrilled to see that one or two Barbies did not totally overtake your perspective of what being an awesome woman means. Hopefully, the same will be true with Miss Lily. Just in case you missed it, I HATE BARBIES. They give girls a skewered view of what being attractive is. When was the last time we saw a real woman who looked like Barbie that had not been surgically altered?