Almost every year since I began this blog, I've written a back-to-school post. I told you guys all about PG's disastrous first day of school drop-off, I related to you J's puking episode in Kindergarten Jesus, and I got all sappy-sentimental with this post from a few years ago. This year, though, I got nothing. The first few days were a cake walk. The most controversial occurrences were the eye rolls I got from the older two when I forced them to stand still in front of their classrooms for a picture. I had barely taken it before they waved and ran off towards the playground.
As for Roo, parents stay with the Kindergartners on the first day. I had thought that leaving her on the second day would be hard since every time the teacher mentioned it, I had to do that blinky-tilt-my-head-back thing to keep the tears on the inside of my eyeballs. But then the second morning came, and together we hung her backpack on the play yard. Then she gave me a kiss, ran off to play with her friends, and I was left standing there on the playground feeling...... really okay. No lumps in my throat, no tears blurring my vision, no emotional flashbacks to her sweet babyhood. I'm a tough nut.
By the way, it helped that I was recovering from a rough morning. Thirty minutes prior, I had been shouting things like "The train is leaving the station in 5 minutes, people! I suggest you find your shoes and get them ON your body!!!" Friends, there is nothing like morning madness to suck the sentimentality out of leaving your kids. Nothing.
Anyway, all this to say that this year, there was no story to be had from the kids' first day of school.
There is however, a story to be told from Back to School Night.
Back to School Night nowadays is nothing like when our parents attended back in the day. If your upbringing was like mine, Back to School Night was always scheduled a few weeks after school started. Your parents probably left you with a sitter and drove to your school, where they sat in your little desks and listened to your teacher talk and answer questions for an hour or so. The agenda looked something like this:
6:00 Principal's Message
6:15-7:00 Teacher's Message in Classrooms
That's it. If there were two of you kids at the same school, your parents probably split up to each attend a classroom. Then they went home. (Actually, my parents probably took advantage of the sitter and went out to dinner.) The whole thing seems kind of calm and relaxing to me.
Our Back to School Night is a much different affair. At my children's school, it's always scheduled before school starts. There is no sitter. Everybody goes to find out who their teacher is and visit their classroom. The agenda looks like this:
4:30- Class lists posted (Translation: Fight the 900 other families for a spot in the parking lot and then muscle your way to the class lists to find your childrens' names and teachers. Also, stop to greet friends you haven't seen in a while. Do this in a large crowd while keeping track of your multiple children and your spouse, who grows irritated with you every time you stop to chat.
5:00- 5:45- First Session with Teachers, Grades K,1, and 2 (Translation: Begin the "Filling Out of the Forms" while simultaneously listening to the teacher describe your child's day and their policies. If you're an old timer like me, you tune out the teacher because you've already been through this twice so it's cool if you just focus on the "Filling Out of the Forms"- until you catch a snippet of the teacher saying something that sounds totally unfamiliar and you feel like a loser for being cocky. )
5:45-6:30- Activity Sign-Ups and T-Shirt Sales in the MPR (Translation: Go stand in a forever line to buy school T-shirts that your kids don't really need. Get to the front of the line to discover that they ran out of the size and style that your child wants. Argue with your children about whether or not they really need to join the Roadrunner Running Club which meets at an ungodly hour before school starts. Continue to irritate your spouse by running into and chatting with friends.
6:30-7:15- Second Session with Teachers, Grades 3, 4, and 5. (Translation: Split up with your spouse. Pray he takes good notes on the doings of child #2's teacher while you attend child #1's class. Continue with the "Filling Out of the Forms". Start to worry about your mind when you realize you're listing the wrong allergies for the wrong child on the wrong form. Realize that half the parents in the room are shaking their heads, crossing things out, and muttering to themselves. Feel better about yourself. Give up on filling out forms and decide to finish it all up at home.
At 7:30 it's all over. You take your tired and hungry kids to Rubio's for dinner, which is crowded with all the other families from school who are also taking all their tired and hungry kids to dinner. Your spouse continues to be irritated with you for chatting it up, but you toss him a burrito and he's appeased. The last two hours have been filled with nervousness, anxiety, information, excitement and chaos. You go home and pour yourself a well-deserved glass of wine.
This morning PG said to me "Mom, I just realized something sad. When you were going to school, you had to get up early every day. Then you had kids, and just because we're going to school, you STILL have to get up early every day."
Well, yes. And in between my high school graduation and the birth of my first child 13 years later, there was this thing that I had called a career, and before that was an experience known as college, and multiple other meaningless jobs along the way which required me to get up early. But I didn't tell her any of that. I'll go ahead and rack up the pity points and let her think that school is the be-all-end-all of my existence. That's how it felt at the end of Back To School Night, anyway.
 |
| That's J's "You have exactly 2 seconds to take the picture." smile. |
By the way, it helped that I was recovering from a rough morning. Thirty minutes prior, I had been shouting things like "The train is leaving the station in 5 minutes, people! I suggest you find your shoes and get them ON your body!!!" Friends, there is nothing like morning madness to suck the sentimentality out of leaving your kids. Nothing.
Anyway, all this to say that this year, there was no story to be had from the kids' first day of school.
There is however, a story to be told from Back to School Night.
Back to School Night nowadays is nothing like when our parents attended back in the day. If your upbringing was like mine, Back to School Night was always scheduled a few weeks after school started. Your parents probably left you with a sitter and drove to your school, where they sat in your little desks and listened to your teacher talk and answer questions for an hour or so. The agenda looked something like this:
6:00 Principal's Message
6:15-7:00 Teacher's Message in Classrooms
That's it. If there were two of you kids at the same school, your parents probably split up to each attend a classroom. Then they went home. (Actually, my parents probably took advantage of the sitter and went out to dinner.) The whole thing seems kind of calm and relaxing to me.
Our Back to School Night is a much different affair. At my children's school, it's always scheduled before school starts. There is no sitter. Everybody goes to find out who their teacher is and visit their classroom. The agenda looks like this:
4:30- Class lists posted (Translation: Fight the 900 other families for a spot in the parking lot and then muscle your way to the class lists to find your childrens' names and teachers. Also, stop to greet friends you haven't seen in a while. Do this in a large crowd while keeping track of your multiple children and your spouse, who grows irritated with you every time you stop to chat.
5:00- 5:45- First Session with Teachers, Grades K,1, and 2 (Translation: Begin the "Filling Out of the Forms" while simultaneously listening to the teacher describe your child's day and their policies. If you're an old timer like me, you tune out the teacher because you've already been through this twice so it's cool if you just focus on the "Filling Out of the Forms"- until you catch a snippet of the teacher saying something that sounds totally unfamiliar and you feel like a loser for being cocky. )
5:45-6:30- Activity Sign-Ups and T-Shirt Sales in the MPR (Translation: Go stand in a forever line to buy school T-shirts that your kids don't really need. Get to the front of the line to discover that they ran out of the size and style that your child wants. Argue with your children about whether or not they really need to join the Roadrunner Running Club which meets at an ungodly hour before school starts. Continue to irritate your spouse by running into and chatting with friends.
6:30-7:15- Second Session with Teachers, Grades 3, 4, and 5. (Translation: Split up with your spouse. Pray he takes good notes on the doings of child #2's teacher while you attend child #1's class. Continue with the "Filling Out of the Forms". Start to worry about your mind when you realize you're listing the wrong allergies for the wrong child on the wrong form. Realize that half the parents in the room are shaking their heads, crossing things out, and muttering to themselves. Feel better about yourself. Give up on filling out forms and decide to finish it all up at home.
 |
| Overwhelming mess..... |
 |
| Ba-BAM! Now it's 3 neatly organized and signed packets. Moms are awesome. |
At 7:30 it's all over. You take your tired and hungry kids to Rubio's for dinner, which is crowded with all the other families from school who are also taking all their tired and hungry kids to dinner. Your spouse continues to be irritated with you for chatting it up, but you toss him a burrito and he's appeased. The last two hours have been filled with nervousness, anxiety, information, excitement and chaos. You go home and pour yourself a well-deserved glass of wine.
*****
So you see. Very different experience. Is it just me, or do we complicate things a lot more now? School is practically a job. I even received homework already.  |
| Dear Teacher, my goal is to not resent you for forcing me to set a goal. |
This morning PG said to me "Mom, I just realized something sad. When you were going to school, you had to get up early every day. Then you had kids, and just because we're going to school, you STILL have to get up early every day."
Well, yes. And in between my high school graduation and the birth of my first child 13 years later, there was this thing that I had called a career, and before that was an experience known as college, and multiple other meaningless jobs along the way which required me to get up early. But I didn't tell her any of that. I'll go ahead and rack up the pity points and let her think that school is the be-all-end-all of my existence. That's how it felt at the end of Back To School Night, anyway.
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