I'll Need Some Teeny Tiny Q-Tips, Stat

This is a conversation we had in our car on the way to school this morning.  Two things you should know before you read this:

1)We watched J's school Christmas performance last night, in which he and all the other kids wore elf hats.
2) I have a freaky obsession with keeping my kid's ears clean.

And yes, these 2 facts weave together in a weird way in the conversation below:

Roo: Mama, tomorrow can I be an elf?
Me: Ummm, yeah.  Sure.  How are you going to turn yourself into an elf?
J interrupts: Wait.  Do you want her to be an elf mom?
Me:  I guess.  If it makes her happy then I want her to be an elf.
Roo: It do makes me happy.
Me: Okay, but Roo- you're going to have to grow some big long pointy ears by tomorrow.
Roo: Okay.
J:WELL. Mom. I know something about that and it's going to make you VERY sad.
Me: (thinking he's going to say something along the lines of about how Roo will have to live far away with Santa at the North Pole or not be with us at Christmas or something.)  Okay, what's that J?
J: Elves have big long pointy ears so they probably have LOTS of ear wax.


Elfin earwax.  Huh.

I'm going to file this conversation under "Things that I never would have thought of had I not become a parent."