White Girls Can't Dance. Or Jump. (not this one anyway)

So tonight I took my first Zumba class. If you haven't heard of Zumba, it's more or less an aerobic version of Salsa and Merengue, set to Latin/World music. Lots of hip swaying, booty shakin', and shimmying. It's very high energy, very fun, and very.... um, humbling.

Before I start totally making fun of myself, I have to tell you about my instructor. I have to tell you-no, I want to tell you that a) she was fantastic- high energy, happy, great at choreography, and easy to follow. B.) She's also one of my (8! Love u guys!) blog readers. Hi Melissa! I know you blamed your cough on an oncoming cold, but it's okay for you to admit now that you were just trying to choke back laughter as I fumbled and flailed my way through your class.

Seriously, it was a lot of fun. I'm just glad there weren't any mirrors in the place so I didn't have to see my own image proving to me that yes, I did indeed look as dorky as I felt. While Melissa seemed to be channeling Shakira, I could not even manage to work my arms and legs simultaneously. I had to focus on one or the other, so most of the time I put my energy into salsa stepping. Very difficult for a girl who took 10 years to learn the Roger Rabbit (and I'll still bust that move out on any dance floor, yo).

Can we talk about the body popping, hip shakin', and shimmying? I'm sure that my two sisters who follow this blog, are rolling on the floor laughing right now with the image of me trying my best pop, shake, and shimmy. According to them, it's not what my bod is or isn't doing, it's the face I make when I'm really into it. You know, like the white man's overbite? Except it's not an overbite. It's more like..... um... remember on LaVerne and Shirley the look that Shirley Finney would get when she did her little dance for Carmine? It's kinda like that. A dancing equivalent to an embarrassing O face.
Sara, Karen... I remember the laughter girls. And it still hurts.

Also, can I just say: lots of jumping + 3 vaginal deliveries to children all 8 lbs. and up= no bueno.

BUT.

I am going back for more. Because it was so dang fun. And because one of the biggest surprises of the night (besides the fact that I didn't drop dead of a heart attack- which I fully expected to do) was how much I fell in love with the music. In fact, after I finish this post I'm hopping over to iTunes and downloading every track I can find that comes up under a "Zumba" search. This music makes me want to move! It's going to be my new housecleaning music. Who'd drag a mop with crazy beats like that pumping in the background?
So Melissa, I'll be back. And I'm trading the tired yoga pants for something more latin-inspired. Maybe I'll put a flower in my hair? Or buy a really cute pair of cigarette pants. (I'll just be sure to wear a pair of Depends.)
Cuz that's the kind of spicy Latina I am.

You all have a good night!